Anyways, here is the thing. Is it just me or have girls lost their minds lately! I have had enough of girls talking about nothing else but marriage and how they are too old to be single and should find a husband as soon as possible when they are only around 23!!!

This is crazy! I can never think of getting married or even finding the one at my age! I have just began my life journey and I am not willing to live it for someone else because I think that the purpose of me being born in this life is to get married to that one guy and live my life according to his demands! I mean come on no one owns your life but you and no one should tell you how to live it but you because in the end the only one who will be looking back at your in say 10 years is YOU!

Anyways, back to our subject! I have been looking around and all the sudden half of my school friends are married and the other half are getting married! Some of them even have babies! Why the hell is this happening? Why do girls our age think that marriage is the best thing in the world and that it is all about being with the person you want and the love that you both share! Seriously if any of you that are reading this right now think this way I would advice to give slap your self and open your eyes and have a look at the world cause marriage and having babies is nothing easy or fun!!!!

Ok I am not saying that marriage is no fun at all and full of torture. But it is such a big responsibility! It means that you won’t own your own bedroom or bed anymore! Never flirt or makeout or do even more with any other guy for the rest of your life (this also goes to the young guys too that have been losing their minds as well lately) and it also means that you will no longer live your own life and make your own decisions because face it you will have to make sure your partner is ok with it before you decide to do anything including what you are going to have for lunch on that day!!!

I hope that both young girls and guys start realizing how serious marriage is and how it so not some stupid lovy dovy  game that roams around you sleeping together and spending romantic days and nights with your loved one cause you never know what might happen and you can never be so sure if the person is the one for you or not no matter how long you have known him or her.

Now that this is off my chest! I will be posting soon when I find something else to yap about and annoy you guys with

XXX

Dyaz

 First of all, i would like to thank all of the people that have read my blog and loved my posts! you guys have actually encouraged me on writing back on this blog again

It has been such a long time since i have written anything similar to this in my blog! so many things have happend ever since! i’ll give u a brief of the changes:

 1. I quit work!!! Technicaly i am on annual leave! it feels so good to have some free time again and jus relax and sleep all you want.

2. I turned 21! which is suppose to be a special age or something. it did make me abit depressed at first but i guess am getting the hang of it by now

3. I am single again! dunno what went wrong but to be honest. it wasnt easy going thru the whole break up and getting over thing! love is not easy and at the moment i am really not ready for such a thing!

4. I am leaving the country soon for a period of time! never did it before. I’ve been waiting for this for soo long and now that it is finaly happening it feels so weird! Im still in denial

Thats it about my latest updates. will be posting soon

XXX

Dyaz

Am sick of being stuck in this limbo
I feel like am trapped between two lives
I wanna get over you somehow
But I cannot find a peace of mind
I tried running away from this world
But the facts are eating me alive
All my hurt and all my sorrow
Is because you have taken away my life

my eyes are pouring tears of pain
just like in winter when it rains
all I feel is hurt and pain
all I feel is hurt and pain

I cannot sleep well at night
I cannot smile once in a while
Cuz everything makes no sence in my life
Ever since you left me without telling me why.

Am sick of being stuck in this limbo
I feel like am trapped between two lives
I wanna get over you somehow
But I cannot find a peace of mind
I tried running away from this world
But the facts are eating me alive
All my hurt and all my sorrow
Is because you have taken away my life

If I could only leave behind
All the memories and good times
Being with completed my life
And now that you’re gone I have no purpose in life

I wish I could tell you all of this
I wish you could see how my life is a mess
But I know for once that it wont do me good
Cuz if it did I wouldn’t have been so confused
 

if i told you

tomorrow ill die

and that youll wake up

without me by

ur side

will you believe me

even if i lied

cuz my life is short

and am getting tired

if i told you

tomorrow ill die

will you tell me

that i lost my mind

cuz everyone dies

and everyone cries

but u jus dun care

cuz thats how its life

we all live

we all die

we all laugh

we all cry

we all hurt

we all lie

this is what we call life

we all run

we all hide

we all smile

we all try

we build hopes

in the skies

this is what we call life

if tomorrw i died

will u cry

will u remember me

after a while

will you move on

and have your own life

and maybe remember

that once you were mine

if tomorrow i died

will you come to my grave

tell me u miss me

and that life is a waste

without me with you

its not worth a while

and that u wish

that u were still mine

we all live

we all die

we all laugh

we all cry

we all hurt

we all lie

this is what we call life

we all run

we all hide

we all smile

we all try

we buil hope

in the skies

this is what we call life

Is the sky so high?

What’s so great about life

When one day you’ll die

Why do we really try

To make our best in life

When we know one day

It will fade as we die

Why do we tend to lie

To our selves at most times

Just how we avoid

All the painful times

Why do we always cry

When we dun feel so fine

When we’re hurt inside

All we do is cry

As your life grows by

You will feel brighter

But then you will one day

Realize its all lies

When you put Ur hopes high

And you build Ur all your life

And then one word is said

Will put Ur hopes to an end

Why do we always try

To make others feel fine

We give our heart away

And then we wonder why

When you feel so alive

And so happy at the time

Remember that one day

All of this will die

Some people never find out why

When you do you get this feeling

Like you are floating in the sky

That’s how great is the feeling

Of knowing your purpose in life

Otherwise you’d still be breathing

But you won’t have a goal to survive

Everyone is born for a reason

Loving you is mine

It took me a while to feel it

But then I saw it in your eyes

Now I’m living for a reason

I have a goal to stay alive

Now I know that feeling

When you fall in love with someone’s smile.

Written by: Duaa Zainal, copy right 2007

Finally the weather is good!!! i got soo sick of the heat. anyways.. nuthing dramatic has been going on in my life which is kinda good to be honest. mid terms are soon so all am doing these days is studying my ass off!! work is alrite am finally getting used to it i guess its not that bad after all, i get paid in the end which is the best part

things i am thankfull to have :

1. my mom i love her no matter how much she naggs about me not eating ( although i eat like a cow!) i guess  shes jus too worried which is driving me crazy! but still am thankfull for having her

2. My SuperSam! he is wonderful and an amazing guy i love him to bits and am soo thankfull to have him around.. we do get into stupid fites sometimes but if that wasnt happening in a relationship then there is definatly something wrong going on! anyways he is the best man ever in this world because he takes good care of me n i love him like crazy for that

3. my health. i kno it sounds cheesy but i reallyam finally happy with my body i finally feel like i have a great body that i am really thankfull for not that my old look was horrible but lets jus say i look way better now

4. my two best friends Hackle n Jackle! lol thats not their real names! i havent seen them in ages and i miss them sooo much..

5. am thankfull of having a friend like ALIIIIIIIII he is one crazy ass but i love him n hes been there for me whenever i needed guy tips hope ur happy now ali! what more do u want

Cant think of anything else to be thankfull for.. anyways, will post again when i feel like it..

cya, byeeeee (K)

I was on my way to the hospital minding my own business not in the mood for anything when all the sudden i see this car next to me. i look n i see them waving n smiling! so as a girl who doesnt give a shit n not bothered to bits i drive faster to let them know that am not intrested n they should go shuv their asses somewhere else… but nooooo they try racing me? till i lose controle and hit them! n whos mistake is it when the police came? MINE!!!

how on earth is it my fault when assholes like them try distracting me on the road by racing with me.. n when i screamed my lungs out at them n told them if they are happy with what they’ve done they were like.. we werent flirting n they actually swore to god they didnt n said they were jus in a hurry!!

because of those shitty assholes who have nuthing else to do in the world but look at girls and fantasize about them my whole mood was ruined and so was my baby car now u tell me if its fair or not!

I swear to god if these guys had any manners they would have known how horrible it is to flirt with a girl the way they do! flirting has manners to but i guess some guys have such small brains it cannot observe that the way they flirt can be so insulting to us.

you wanna flirt.. look at the girl, if she looks back n smiles, then u can go n talk to her or something, but flirting while she is ignoring is stupid!! and following her n trying to race with her is even more stupid! 

There are things in life that u cannot live without like water, air, food… etc. but thats not all.. to me the hardest thing of all is when u cannot live without a person. by the time u realize that u cannot live without this person and you have to let go you feel like your life has been torn down and all that u have built has turned into dust. its not like i broke up with my boyfriend or anything but i have reached to a level where i feel like i am too dependant on him.. i cannot go to sleep before i say goodnite to him, i cannot go through a whole day without hearing his voice and checking up on him, and i cannot even go through a week: without seeing him.

having all of that  makes me feel good about my life most of the time.. but what if someday this person you are soo dependant on lets go? or what if he/she has to be far away from you? it must be soo hard to even think of it! thats why lately i have realized that i cannot be soo dependant on a person no matter who he/she is to me and no matter how much i love him/her.. its not gonna be easy but its the only way to protect myself from getting hurt or feeling lonely.. the only way that can make all of this easier is by commiting my self either to work or studies and putting bigger prioreties to those things or getting a new hobbie or a new pet or something..

Thing is how can i make my self love my job when i dun really feel appreciated in it? to be honest all i feel like is that i am being underastemated and that i am being treated like i am not taking my job seriously! maybe i am exaggerating a bit but thats how i really feel like..